I was just walking through Burbank and saw a hobo using solar panels on his shopping cart. We must be in trouble if the hobos are researching alternative sources of fuel...
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
Just had a 10 minute long conversation with my cat about how if I died, and he needed to eat me to live, I'd totally be ok with it. Definitely still drunk.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
Randomize
