you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
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