I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
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