I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
Randomize