i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Randomize
