I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
Randomize
