I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
I have already put on my inside pants.
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
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