I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
I'm watching my cat lick a used condom wrapper on my nightstand and I'm too hungover to move and do anything about it. Tequila Tuesdays can not be a thing.
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
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