i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
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