You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
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