I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
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