There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize
