He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Randomize