Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
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