I haven't been laid since Bush was president.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Randomize
