I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
You should frame my arrest warrant.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
Randomize
