Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
You need to be on (or possibly create) the international emoji committee to address all of these glaring oversights
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
Randomize
