Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
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