ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
My liver just broke up with me...
I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
