Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
Randomize
