Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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