Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
we found you in the kitchen at five am trying to make a vodka omelette. you said you didn't want to live in a world where your two favourite things couldn't be together.
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
If you think me talking about that hot guy accepting my LinkedIn request is pornographic, I’m not sure how you’re gonna feel when I tell you I fucked a stranger on a park bench last weekend
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
