when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
If I die tonight, wear a V neck to my funeral.
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
After getting kicked out of the bar, you proceeded to McDonald's, ordered 30 nuggets, slammed them all back in 5 minutes and then stole 3 traffic cones...how you only got charged with drunk in public is beyond me.
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
Randomize
