I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
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