So I just opened the bag you gave me and those panties aren't mine...
oh
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
Randomize
