Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
I'm going to start referring to my liver is Livy. I feel like if I give it an affectionate nickname it will hate me less. Livy isn't ready for syllabus week.
I think we all know your liver needs a man's name.
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
He told me I look like a librarian today. I hope that means he has a librarian fetish or something
Disregard. He says he said I look "agrarian" today and just proceeded to compare me to Mumford and Sons. Fuck it, I'm going home and drinking
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
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