i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
Great parenting moment: noticing your kid is going to puke from gorging fish sticks and sending her outside. Then watching her puke on your dog.
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
Randomize
