Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
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