Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
Randomize
