hotel room ftw
Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
Randomize