Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
Randomize
