dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
I just handed the barista at Starbucks a panty liner instead of my card....maybe I should upgrade this Tall to a Venti...
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
Randomize