i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
Randomize
