I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
i'm too stoned to be pregnant. the kicking is morse code for wanting beef jerky.
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
Never let him bartend when he's tripping. He sprinkled a ton of mexican shredded cheese over a jack and coke and called in a Monterey Jack Daniels.
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
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