Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
Randomize
