Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
Sorry was covered in semen when you texted me. Just walking back from the Harvard Club
All you needed to say was one of those sentences and the other would've been implied.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
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