i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
I party with great urgency now.
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
Randomize
