week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
ETA 20 minutes and if you greet me at the door with a gin & tonic I’ll give you head.
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
Randomize
