Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
Randomize