So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize
