did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
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