everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
Randomize
