Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
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