So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
He asked me when I was coming to bed while simultaneously drilling a fart into the mattress. Don't fucking get married.
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
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