I think I'm going to be in trouble for sneaking out last night. My Dad saw me drive up this morning when he was leaving early for work.
What'd you say?
I told him I was sleep driving
I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
Randomize