does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
I know you would never do it--but if I ever walk into your house and find a "live love laugh" ANYTHING, I will commit you to an asylum. If it is a vinyl decal adhered to the wall, I will just smother you myself.
Randomize
