Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
Acid is not a monday night drug
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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