She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
So I have the hangover from hell, spent all night puking, and there's a septic tank truck parked outside the house literally pumping shit. You win God.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
Randomize
