I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
Randomize