I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
Randomize
