Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
My vagina is very pro this idea
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Randomize
