we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
Randomize
